The Chatter: Rescue

This morning Maia and Ruby and I woke up before the sun to the pitter patter of rain on the roof.

I immediately opened all the windows and emptied the house of it's lingering summer remnants.

Today feels like fall and I'm full of gratitude.

Friday is a hard day for me, it's incredibly long and intense and leaves me drained and a bit unraveled.

However, this morning I realized how lucky I am to have such balance in my life.

My work is often overwhelming and taxing, but leaves me eager to play play with my children.

And then just when my children empty my reserves of patience, I get to go to work and be with adults.

I'm grateful for that.

Anyway, this post wasn't meant to be about me, but about the cute conversation that happened between my kids this morning as they were playing nicely together.

Ruby was dressed in a pink princess dress, when suddenly Maia said "I want to rescue someone! Ruby, can I rescue you?"
It took some convincing, but finally Ruby agreed to be rescued.

Maia put on her ladybug wings and headband.

"Ok Ruby, what kind of rescuing do you need? Fire or emergency?"

"Emergency."

"What kind of emergency? Broken leg? Cat stuck in a tree? or what?"

"Twirling."

"Twirling emergency? Ok!"

At this point I interjected. "Maia, what's a twirling emergency?"

"You know, when you can't twirl!"

And she was off to rescue her sister.

Happy weekend and may all your emergencies be of the twirling variety.

Crumbs

Today marks the third week of my new workout schedule.

The one where I get up at 5 A.M. on Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday.

Don't they say that if you do something for 2 weeks it becomes a new habit?

I don't think getting up early is ever going to be fun, but I guess it's getting easier. 

The hardest part is the evening because I can barely keep my eyes open past 9.

On the positive side, I am feeling quite fit and good.

And in other news, Ruby is no longer sleeping through the night.

She wakes up between midnight and 2 and walks into our room wanting to sleep in our bed.

I'm not against co-sleeping from a philosophical standpoint, but for our family it doesn't work.

Last night we had a big talk about both girls staying in bed until it's morning (both girls have been waking up a 5 lately, we think they might have been hearing the garage door open as I leave for the gym, so now we're parking the car outside and I'm sneaking out of the house all ninja-like while I'm half asleep).

Something woke me up around 2 or 3 and I look over, and Ruby is sleeping on the little couch in our room.

And then at 4:40 she made her way to our bed, wanting in, and I nudged Aleks to take care of it because I wanted every last bit of that 20 minutes before my alarm went off.

We're a bit exhausted these days.

I think I'm starting to unravel...

Thank goodness she's cute.

Also, look at Aleks with his mini me.

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The past couple of weeks have presented several new and exciting possibilities for me professionally.

I hate to be vague, but I'm still sorting it all out in my head.

As I get older, I'm finding myself less willing to say yes to everything. 

Part of it is that my time is a limited resource and extremely valuable. And another part is that I have a better idea of what doing a good job entails, and I've really got to believe in what I'm doing if I'm going to invest time and energy.

But, alongside that hesitancy is excitement and anticipation for the good things ahead.

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Maia's teacher takes pictures of the kids throughout the week and then uploads them onto a website for the parents to check whenever they want.

I took a look at them for the first time yesterday and was so glad I got a peak into her school day.

Here are a few of my favorites:

(I tried to enlarge them, but the quality got really bad)

These girls are best friends

Dad's Day

Maia's class

I'm sure they're playing Lion King here. It's Maia's FAVORITE game.

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And this.
Because it is ridiculously cute and makes me happy and is full of love and being in the moment and enjoy!

10

10 years.

One decade.

5 just us.

5 with kids.

10 years feels like being so intertwined, you sometimes forget that you've worked really hard to get to this place.

It means that we are completely different people than when we got married.

Thank God we've been able to flex and grow and spread our roots without suffocating or containing the other.

Whatever you want to call it, lucky, blessed, fortunate, charmed, I feel that way about having Aleks as my partner.

How differently life could have turned out.

Why do we work when so many others don't?

There's no way to answer that, but maybe it's because he often reminds me "hey, we're on team Sternfeld-Dunn."

Or because he cares so deeply that I get to pursue whatever it is I want to pursue.

Or because he got up in the middle of the night with our first colicky baby more than his fair share.

Or because his exuberance compliments my cautiousness.

In the spirit of ten years, here are some things on which I am reflecting.

10 foods that Aleks has grown to like since we've been married:
1. mustard
2. mushrooms
3. spinach (which he pronounces "spinage" and which I give him hell for every time he says it)
4. tomatoes (cooked)
5. bell peppers
6. onions
7. raspberries
8. pork tenderloin
9. quinoa
10. wheat berries

 2003

2004

10 things I never thought my husband would be interested in:

1. biking (i have vivid memories of him cussing me out as we rode our bikes together in the Pullman hills)

2. running

3. cooking (before we got married, his speciality was rice-a-roni, now he can cook better than me. Yes, honey, I admit it, you're a better cook.)

4. growing his own vegetables

5. getting up at 5 a.m. to workout

6. buying a motorcycle

7. singing Harold Hill in "The Music Man"

8. America's Got Talent

9. getting a tattoo

10. opera

2005

2006

2007

5 things I hope to eliminate and 5 things I hope to do more of (I'll let you figure out which is which)

1. kiss

2. roll my eyes

3. micromanage

4. laugh

5. tell other people how wonderful you are

6. get upset over little things like jeans left on the floor

7. tell you that you smell bad

8. be your biggest cheerleader

9. doing that thing that he hates, but I do it anyway because I love doing it

10. let you know how much I appreciate all you do

2008

Early in our marriage, Aleks read a study that said that the majority of married couples go to bed at different times.

This greatly concerned my sweet husband and he decided that we should always go to bed at the same time.

I agreed, not feeling too strongly either way.

2009

Most nights I fall asleep in front of the couch or I say that I want to go to bed and so we head up the stairs where I read for 5 minutes or so until my eyes no longer stay open.

And more often than not Aleks stays awake on his iPad for a good hour or two more before falling asleep.

2010

I think around the time I was pregnant with Ruby, falling asleep became hard for me.

I would ask Aleks to rub my back and he obliged, making soft, light circles until I relaxed enough to sleep.

Ever since then, my husband has rubbed my back as I drift off.

Every single night.

2011

I feel like there are two significant things in this story.

One is that as small as it may seem, going to bed at the same time for 10 years has helped us stay connected.

Life isn't getting any less busy and I'm grateful that he had the idea to lay a foundation for togetherness all those years ago when life was so much simpler.

2012

And secondly, my husband rubs my back EVERY SINGLE NIGHT.

That says so much about the kind of man he is.

Generous

Giving

Kind

Patient

2013

 Oh honey, what a pair we are.

Me, type A. You, the opposite of that, whatever it is.

I like things neat and tidy. You don't really notice a mess (remember all that old rice we found behind your couch when we were moving you out of your old apartment?).

I get stressed out easily. You know how to enjoy life.

And it's all these differences that have made us better together than we are apart.

I love you doesn't quite cover it.

So I'll just say "Go Team Sternfeld-Dunn!"

Here's to the rest of our lives.

Together.

Changing Seasons

I first started noticing the changes during the many flights we took this summer.

As we waited to board I would see families around me, strollers pilled high with diapers bags and babies being rocked to sleep over shoulders of parents who warily glanced around at their fellow passengers.

There were several young families like this, whose gaze passed right over our family, to lock eyes with each other, understanding and solidarity passing between them.

We used to be a part of that club, seeking out the other families with small babies, feeling sympathetic and instantly bonded to those, like us, just trying to survive.

And now, here we are.

Traveling without a stroller or diaper bag.

Each little girl carrying her own backpack, holding a hand as we walk through the busy terminal.

Ruby turned 3 last week and just like that, she's pooping in the potty and noticeably absent from the room is her diaper pail and the baskets which contained pull-ups and wipes.

Nana bought Ruby a big girl bed for her birthday and it arrived on Friday.

And now there is an even more tangible evidence to our changing seasons.

We no longer have a crib mattress in the house, which means I got rid of a stack of crib sheets and crib mattress covers and the training potty is on its way out as well.

And speaking of changing seasons, the weather has finally turned here in Kansas.

The slightly cooler temperatures with rain filled skies have invigorated me.

And it reminds me that change is good. 

Necessary even.

It seems we've entered a new phase of life.

I knew we'd get here, I just couldn't see past the exhausting day to day.

Little things gleam at me like little jewels.

Walking down the sidewalk without pushing a stroller or baby wearing or carrying a diaper bag, totally unencumbered.

Blow drying my hair whenever I want.

Being able to actually use some of those activities I saw on Pinterest.

Many of my friends are in the height of their baby making careers while we made "no more babies" a permanent choice in our house this summer.

Part of me is sad that I won't be in that expectant mommy sorority anymore.

However, this new place we find ourselves in is pretty wonderful.

I'm going to say it: the best so far.

The Chatter: Reading

Yesterday on Facebook I posted as my status update:

"Maia just read me 10 Bobs books (with minimal help). I'm beyond proud and ridiculously tired. That took more patience than I knew I had."

After I posted it, I realized that it might be misleading. Especially since I now know that a reading child is not anything like what I expected.

I thought once Maia was reading, she'd curl up on her bed and independently turn the pages as she immersed herself in stories.

Turns out that it's a lot of inconsistency in the beginning, requiring parental involvement.

Which in turn involves lots of deep breathing.

But yesterday was the first time that Maia asked to read with me.

And the phrase "reading is fun!" actually came out of her mouth.

And she didn't give up or get frustrated.

There was no way in hell that I was going to mess up this opportunity.

So I let her be silly and bit my tongue every time we came to a word she had seen before or wasn't thinking or focused and the result was that she wanted to read all 10 Bob's Books with me.

Maia has had all the reading tools for awhile.

Aleks said it best:

"It's like Maia has purchased a full tool box and has carefully hung up each tool on the wall in her garage, but doesn't quite understand how to use them."

Yesterday was the first time that I've seen her get out those tools and start to use them in the correct way.

It's so exciting.

I tried to get some video of her reading and of course the book I captured is not a great example of Maia's ability to focus.

If anything, it's a better example of how I tried to remain patient with Ruby jumping on my head.

But, it might be interesting to some of you, especially grandmas, papas, gramps, and nanas.

Happy Friday!

Party day!

During the days leading up to Ruby's birthday, she kept telling me that she wanted to have a party.

I felt incredibly guilty because she doesn't really have any friends her age yet.

All of Maia's friends have siblings who are a year younger than Ruby and she thinks of them as babies 

(even though you're not Gigi and Pippa and Aida!).

Also, Maia didn't get a birthday party until she was 4.

So, I held my breath as we decorated the night before and planned a jam packed day to keep her occupied and excited.

I've started a new workout schedule where I go to the gym 3 times a week at 5 in the morning.

(Gross, I know, I know)

So when I got home the girls were up and Ruby barely said hello before tearing into the stack of presents awaiting her.

A wonderful thing about 3 year olds?

They love the book of tattoos or stickers from the dollar store just as much as pricey doll house.

Maia left for school, so Ruby and I...

made frosting!

After lots of sugar consumption before 8 AM, we headed to gymnastics where Ruby attended her first class by herself.

She cried pretty hard in the beginning, but soon warmed up and loved waving at me through the window.

We went to Panera and got a treat (it was her birthday! there's no such thing as too much sugar on a birthday, right?!) before picking up Maia from school.

As we waited for dismissal, Maia's class was coming in from recess and they all sang "Happy Birthday" to Ruby. It was the sweetest thing ever. 

Ruby was super shy and happy.

After nap time we headed to the nail salon for manicures and pedicures!

It was my girls' first experience with professional nail painters and they LOVED it.

Ruby wanted purple with sparkles on her toes.

Maia wanted black with sparkles for her toes

and yellow with sparkles on her fingers.

Well, Ruby then wanted black on one hand

and red on the other.

With sparkles of course.

Well, there just happens to be a froyo place next door to the nail salon, so...

AND there was a tv playing cartoons!

Best. Day. Ever.

Um, ok little lady. You're not 15 yet. Uncross those legs.

After froyo, we headed to the pool and swam off the sugar.

It was a wonderfully busy, happy day celebrating our Ruby.

And I should add, Ruby said several times, "Thank you for my party mommy!" so I guess she got what she wanted after all!

Phew.

Ruby turns 3!

This little princess turns three tomorrow.

Gosh, remember when she was this little?

Thank goodness for this picture, I can just barely peer into the haze that our lives were at this time and pull this sweet face to the surface.

My sweet Ruby, who didn't get her first tooth until she was 17 months old.

She certainly has a full set of chompers now.

Ruby continues to be my cuddle bug, craving physical affection and always responding to a snuggle or kiss.

This year her will has emerged in full force, making me very tired at times, but so hopeful that it will serve Ruby well as she learns to use it properly.

Often I look at Ruby, studying her face, trying to find some familiarity in her features.

She looks so much like her dad.

But the inside resembles me quite a bit.

That will I spoke of earlier? 

She comes by that honestly.

I recognize her introverted personality and her sensitivity as my own.

 But there are also things that are uniquely Ru.

Her intense focus, 

love of books, 

sweet mothering tendencies toward her dolls,

desire to make Maia laugh,

how she runs, all feet and arms.

 Oh sweet girl, so many wonderful things await you this year.

Happiest of birthdays my love.